Tag Archives: photos

The Hungry Turtle

Recently I have been blogging every day and enjoying it – but today I am tired, drained and feel more sluggish than Jabba The Hutt. I decided to read through my old journal, to find a post to recycle. It didn’t really work out though… My old posts make me feel sad and odd today. *mope*

To cheer myself up, I’ve decided  to share a photo I stole, from a message board I used to belong to. I forget who took it (it was ages ago but if anyone can tell me, I’d love to credit her). It is the best picture of turtle eating a strawberry EVAH.

Twilight Cat

Actually, as vampires go, Zuul looks a lot more like good old-fashioned Dracula.

Brandon’s Summer School Graduation Picture

Brandon now has a Street Dance degree, innit?

Further to my last post, here is a picture of the man himself, in his little gown and mortar board. Bless. He did do a really excellent rap, about recycling plastic bags, at the presentation ceremony. Look at those tired eyes – that’s what four days of student life does to you.

Americans: This Is A Vest

Following on from my last post, about the REAL meaning of the word “jumper”… I shall now show you poor, deluded Americans, what the word “VEST” means (and doesn’t mean): 

THIS IS NOT A VEST

This first picture is of a WAISTCOAT. A waistcoat is not, and never has been, a VEST. 

THIS IS A VEST

 The second picture I have for you IS a VEST. Look at it! Say “VEST”! That’s what a vest is. 

I’ve even made the waistcoat shot boring and the REAL vest picture extremely interesting, to help you fix this information in your mind. I’m so good to you. It isn’t easy, having to look at these kinds of pictures all morning and select good ones. I’ve been staring at that REAL VEST for so long now my eyes are hurting. I can still manage a few more minutes though… Mmmmm, VEST.

Mindless Vandals

When I lived in Brighton, I would see bikes like this at least twice a week.

What kind of idiot goes around damaging bicycles? Was the motive sheer vandalistic pleasure? Frustration that the bike locks wouldn’t break and therefore the bikes couldn’t be stolen?  Or was it a personal vendetta, against cyclists?

Sometimes the way people behave utterly baffles me. Don’t they have ANY feelings for others? No consciences at all? No human decency? Virtually everyone I know has been a victim of crime, or several crimes. We are forced to scuttle from place to place, watched by CCTV, clinging to our possessions and regarding everyone else as a threat. Brilliant.

We need to stop fostering such a huge sense of “entitlement” in our children. We need to stop making TV shows where success depends on impressing bullies like Simon Cowell and fame is the only goal. We need to stop making TV shows like Big Brother, where showing off and trying to be popular are more important than being genuinely charming and accomplished. Maybe we just need to turn off the TV entirely, go out and pick up some litter.

Every time I look at the picture I took of those bikes, I get like this. I get angry and frustrated. I want to go into Brandon’s school and start lecturing kids about films and computer games. I want to tell them that in REAL LIFE, it isn’t acceptable to smash a room up, because you’re upset about something. I want to tell them that REAL justice isn’t served without a trial. I want to tell them that those “achievements” you earn on Xbox 360 are NOT achievements at all but are just something you sit around getting when you can’t be bothered to LIVE. I want to tell them that most of us adults are a bad example and we need them to be better than we are/were.

I don’t really know how to wrap this up but I’ve gone on for too long and I’ve ranted enough now. Thanks for reading. Take care out there and park your bike in a safe place, or better still, fit it with a booby trap. I need to make some tea, to calm me down.

Zuul’s Upstairs Window Plunge!

When Brandon came home from Cadets, on Monday night, Dave and I pretended we had become Mormons. It wasn’t big, it wasn’t clever but it WAS very funny (for us). Some of you read the post I made about it and expressed concern for Brandon’s emotional welfare. Sadly for Brandon, his nerves had a worse test to endure, just 15, or so, minutes after our cruel trick.

Monday night was dark, wet and windy but nevertheless, having finished with our little ruse, Dave decided to pop out and get some Coke. Meanwhile, Brandon went upstairs, followed by Zuul (our youngest cat). Zuul isn’t an ordinary cat – he has a perpetual look of insanity in his eyes, he is a compulsive eater and he often has long arguments with Dave, where he tries to get the last “miaow”. You never know what he will do next.

Suddenly Brandon called me to his room,

“MUM! My window was open and now Zuul is outside, on the window sill!”.

I ran upstairs to Brandon’s room, yelling NOT to reach out to the cat. Bran was still looking out at Zuul, then looked at me, in shock.

“Zuul has JUMPED!” he cried and started laughing hysterically. I mean REAL hysteria.

“WHAT!?” I yelled, horrified.  It was true, Zuul had gone from the window sill and plunged down, into the rainy darkness. We headed down to the back garden, hearts in mouths. I reassured Brandon, by reminding him that our lawn was about two feet high and that in any case, Zuul was so fat he would probably bounce.

At first we couldn’t see Zuul, in the darkness. It was very quiet and I was worried… But then I found him. He was absolutely fine! He was rather subdued and kept blinking slowly, with a far-off look in his eyes, but nothing was broken. Meanwhile Brandon was still in shock, intermittently laughing like an idiot. Dave came in and got the whole story, in a torrent of madness.

Maybe it was some kind of “sign”…

(Brandon has now fully recovered).

Forgiveness? It May Be Too Soon…

Today, the Archdeacon of Manchester visited our Church. He seemed like a very nice bloke and he gave quite a moving sermon, on forgiveness. I was with him right up to the point when he suggested somebody we might all consider showing forgiveness to at the moment…

Robert Green, the fumbling England goalie, who helped America to draw with us in our first World Cup match.

Lord, why must You test me like this?

Brandon In Uniform

I love this picture of Brandon. He really needs to learn a new pose though.

A Rare Picture Of Me

Take a good look, because you won’t often see a picture of me on here! After posting yesterday about how often to blog, I’ve had an insanely busy Sunday with no time to write much. Added to that, I haven’t lined anything up from my old journal… So instead of being creative, I’m going to use a picture our Priest took at the Festival I told you about.

Despite the way the photo has come out, I DO have breasts and half my teeth are NOT missing. Oh and the guy in the T shirt really IS a trainee clergyman.

My Sons

 Here are pictures of my three sons. Brandon is 14 but this picture was taken about a year ago. Paul (on guitar) is 29 and Steven is 26. Paul and Steven are both 6′ 2″ tall and Brandon is catching up fast. All of my kids are good-looking, because I rule.

He battles with crippling shyness.

Showing off, just like Mummy.