I’m going to tell you all my favourite old (and completely unrelated) joke:
One day, a Vicar was asked by the Women’s Institute to give a talk about sex. He didn’t mind agreeing to give the talk but he was a bit worried that his wife wouldn’t like him doing it – so in his Diary he wrote “Talk to the Women’s Institute, about sailing”.
The day after the sex lecture, the Vicar’s wife was out shopping. After a while she bumped into the Chairwoman of the Women’s Institute.
“I thought the talk your husband gave last night was really excellent!” said the Chairwoman, “He certainly seemed like quite an expert on the subject!”.
“Did he?” said the Vicar’s wife, “I was surprised to see what he was going to talk about in his Diary, but I’m even MORE surprised that he sounded like an expert! He hardly knows anything about it! I mean, he has only done it twice… The first time he was sick and the second time his hat blew off!”.
HAHAHAHA! HAVE A GREAT DAY, ALL YOU CRAZY AMERICANS!
(I love that joke, I only hope you can all forgive me for indulging myself.)