Following on from my last post, about the REAL meaning of the word “jumper”… I shall now show you poor, deluded Americans, what the word “VEST” means (and doesn’t mean):
THIS IS NOT A VEST
This first picture is of a WAISTCOAT. A waistcoat is not, and never has been, a VEST.
THIS IS A VEST
The second picture I have for you IS a VEST. Look at it! Say “VEST”! That’s what a vest is.
I’ve even made the waistcoat shot boring and the REAL vest picture extremely interesting, to help you fix this information in your mind. I’m so good to you. It isn’t easy, having to look at these kinds of pictures all morning and select good ones. I’ve been staring at that REAL VEST for so long now my eyes are hurting. I can still manage a few more minutes though… Mmmmm, VEST.
We all know there are lots of words that Americans get wrong: They call crisps “chips” for instance, they call a lift an “elevator”… That’s all pretty well-known, Brits have got used to it and tried to make allowances for such mistakes. However, some words that Americans get wrong are more obscure and frankly just CONFUSING. As far as I’m concerned, Americans need to be re-educated about these words and taught to use them properly.
What if I wrote a blog entry about Brandon and said, “Bran was going out, so he put on his favourite jumper”? Americans would go “WTF?” and imagine my son wearing THIS:
THIS IS NOT A JUMPER.
They would, of course, be WRONG. Despite his admittedly camp demeanor, Brandon hasn’t been out in a DRESS yet. Not even a PINAFORE DRESS, like the one above.
So what would he be wearing then, if I said “jumper”? He would be wearing THIS:
THIS IS A JUMPER
Which is NOT a dress, it is a JUMPER.
Look at it, learn the name, FORGET the dress. Repeat after me “THIS IS A JUMPER”. Congratulations! You are now speaking English!